Bloody Nosed Dog

In the ranks of "too unbelievable to be true" this story is true, and I am still in shock that it happened in the conference room of a subsidiary of one of the largest and most profitable companies in the world.

A vice president of this company has a very close relationship with her dog. We are not allowed to call her a dog, but her daughter. Ok. We can do that. Humor her, I suppose. It's just not worth the argument.

Last week, this daughter-dog got sick. Poor dog. Had a cold and a bloody nose. Ms. VP had nobody to take care of her daughter-dog so she brought her to work. She laid down some sheets on the floor and spent the day coddling the dog. When the dog sneezed (often), blood was spattered, but at least she put down sheets. Ok, so you think that's a little weird, maybe kind of provincial, maybe even sweet how much she loves her animal. But it doesn't end there.

Ms. VP has come into the office because she has an important meeting with a supplier. Instead of locking the daughter-dog for the hour in her office, she puts her in a baby stroller and takes her into the conference room for the meeting. She greets the suppliers with blood spatter on her face and tries to kiss them hello. During the meeting she cradles the daughter-dog and talk baby-talk (ie "Oh my little baby it's ok go to sleep shhh shhh shhh type of thing) and feeds her from a bottle. Remember, the dog is still sneezing blood all over the place. This is a white dog.

The meeting continues but apparently from the shellshock it is impossible to concentrate. The meeting ends with that nagging in the back of everybody's brain that they've been punk'd but Ashton Kutcher never popped out of the closet to let them know.