With that in mind, while browsing in the lingerie section at Macy's, I decided to try on some of those new fangled girdles they sell in varying shapes and styles (skinnier thighs! slim your waist! trim your bust! lose 10 pounds with this garment!) made from super-sonic, stretchy, futuristic, silky and ultra-synthetic fabric. And it's true, they cling so tightly you cannot help but look like Superwoman with really flat boobs (unless you get the ones with the bra built in, in which case you would have regular looking boobs to complement your newly found skinny waist).
You think there is a trick to looking so thin? Yes there is, and here is the WARNING -- these garments are nearly impossible to remove. I was on the verge of calling the saleswoman into my kiosk to assist with the tugging, as my shoulder was nearly dislocated. Thankfully I finally got it off. Thank goodness because nobody needs to see me in that position, even an anonymous Macy's clerk.