U.S. Open Mania

Last night I went to the women's finals where Maria Sharapova creamed that Belgian woman with a lot of H's in her name and whose name I can't remember in 2 straight sets. It was really good tennis, and thankfully over fast. I get easily bored by games involving balls.

We stayed until midnight for the mixed doubles final, which was purportedly Martina Navratilova's last Grand Slam game. Maybe her last professional tennis match ever, I'm not entirely sure which one. I imagine she will play again. It's hard to imagine that she will just quit cold turkey. Last night she won her 59th Grand Slam title, which in truth was won by her incredible partner Bob Bryan. This guy has a serve that is so fast you actually can't see the ball. He won several straight games on Aces. Or at least it seemed that way. I wasn't keeping count, though I'm sure someone was. The final game took under a minute (the husband timed it), and on the last serve of the match the other team just let the ball go by, realizing that it was a lost cause trying to return those insane serves.

Through my binoculars I could see that between sets Bob Bryan would eat from these foil packets, whose corner he would rip off, and then suck them, much in the way one would eat a Gogurt. Then he would take a drink of water immediately. I wonder what that stuff is. If anybody is reading this and knows, can you please let me know?

HOWEVER, much more interesting, and incredibly funny, was this section of an article on www.slate.com called "Dispatch from the U.S. Open" by Dan Cois about the more minor games going on on courts outside of the main stadium. I must share:

Over on Court 14, boys' singles player Jonathan Eyserric gets some help from a heat-addled ball boy. The second-seeded Eyserric, a talented French lefty, is a set up on unseeded Michal Konecny but seems like he's about to give away the second. As Konecny serves at 4-2, 40-30, the ball boy, overwhelmed by the bright sun, loudly barfs all over the court at the foot of the umpire stand. He then stands up straight, hands behind his back, as if hoping that no one will notice. Then he leans over and barfs again. The ball boy is led off the court while an obviously grossed-out court attendant cleans up the chunks. Ten minutes later, when play resumes, Konecny double faults and Eyserric takes the game. He celebrates with a Tiger-esque fist-pump, while the court attendant behind him holds her hands over her face, trying to ward off the smell."

In fact, the entire article is hysterical. http://www.slate.com/id/2149239/. Enjoy.